Just a quick post from Santa Monica CA. I've been spending some time reading second rate paper back novels by the pool. This morning I decided to go have a nice breakfast at one of the cafes at my hotel - the Fairmont Santa Monica. Its a lovely hotel, a bit past its prime but still getting a solid **** 1/2 stars for it's efforts. The outdoor cafe is a beautiful setting complete with waterfalls, koi pond with turtles, and a certain European sensibility that appeals to my snooty, semi-world traveler persona.
The view from my breakfast table above was lovely and the sounds of the trickling waterfall drowned out the traffic noise and children screaming in the pool. All was right with the world. As I sat and soaked up this lovely scene, drinking my English Breakfast tea with a splash of milk, I pondered the thought of how fortunate I was to be able to enjoy such a splendid morning as this.
Just as these warm and fuzzy thoughts were soothing my over-worked brain I was brought back to the harsh reality of my life.
A large bird had just shit on my shoulder.
Yes I said shit as that is the only word to describe the goopy green turd that destroyed my peaceful morning. Now I am sure there are many different ways to react when a bird drops a giant load on you in public. My response was first one of disgust. Secondly, I became aware that my flailing of the arms and hands might alert my other diners to my predicament so I tried to wipe off the offending poo with as much decorum as possible. I waved for my check and proceeded to pretend that nothing had happened all the while dying to get back to room and rip off the poop stained shirt I was wearing.
I managed to wipe off most of the offense and I thought I had done a pretty good job of disguising my ordeal and I was sitting quietly waiting for my check. Suddenly, Rico Suave Italian dude tapped me on my shoulder. "Yes", I said demurely, pleasantly surprised by Rico's smarmy good looks! He leaned down to whisper something to me. What could it be, I wondered?........ "You missed some", was his remark as he pointed to my back. Yes, there was still a long green trail of bird crap all the way down the back of my shirt.
Nothing will bring you down off your lofty perch as fast as a bird dropping it's goods on you in public. And that, my friends, is my thought for the day.
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