Anonymous ~ Why I LOVE Blogging!

"Dear Anonymous,

You left me the following kind message today and it was so touching that I thought I would share it with all three of my loyal readers:


"Comment"

"You are at best a skinking f****ing cow. You've published a book on window treatments? Wow, what's next a book on faux (f**k) finishes.

Lard Ass.

Professionals don't comment on others work. Get it - pro. You pro-found hog."

"Anonymous"

(quote edited with * to protect the unprofessional)

Let us digest this deep and meaningful comment, shall we?

First: I believe you meant stinking with a T not "skinking" with a K unless "skinking" is some new form of insult that I am not aware of ~ very possible. However, I am glad to report that I do bathe daily and apply deodorant liberally so if you did mean stinking I may have to disagree.

Second: I was a bit of a cow the last few years ( Wow, do you actually know me?) But I am happy to say that I have lost 40 pounds since last October and am actually probably well out of the cow category at present. Thanks for your genuine concern about my health.

Third: I have actually published three books not one:

The first on window treatments ( it's only 585 pages and filled with 3000 original designs and illustrations done by myself so I can see how it is easily dismissed).

The Second on Bedding ( again only 580 pages and thousands of original designs and illustrations).

The third is a professional marketing manual and software system for the interior design trade. A mere 350 pages ( so embarrassing!)

I am currently writing two more, haven't decided on the finished length yet. I'll be sure to let you know.

Fourth: I do not presently plan on writing a book on faux, or as you so eloquently put it, "f**k" finishes but never say never. I did however spend many years doing decorative painting, murals and faux finishes for my clients during my scant twenty years as an interior designer.

Fifth: I believe the "Lard Ass" comment was referring to my "cow" like appearance to which I will again refer to my recent weight loss. I will admit to still having some excess lard on my ass but a bony ass is just unsightly, not to mention uncomfortable.

Sixth: Since you claim that "professionals do not comment" on the work of other "pros" I will have to defer to you because you are obviously hands down far more professional than I will ever be. You'd better alert all the other designers, writers, and publishers in the world though, I don't think they are aware of this highly professional rule.

Seven: In answer to your question "Get it pro?" I must say, Oh yes, I get it alright. It's crystal clear my friend, no need to remind again. You are the professional and I am a sad and underachieving amateur. After all anyone famous enough and as accomplished as yourself that they don't even have to identify themselves and can go by the name anonymous has to have a formidable resume of achievements.

Eight: As to your sweet parting words " You Pro-found hog" I must say that I am duly impressed with your use of the English language. Your verbiage is so very descriptive and visual. However, I must again refer you to my recent weight loss as I do not believe that I fit into the hog catagory either. I am well within my thin range. Not to say that I might not become a fat ass again at some point in my life. One never knows - does one?

I must tell you my dear "Anonymous" that you are the very reason that I love blogging. You just never know what you are going to find when you open up that comments page. Thankfully there are people like yourself who make the great personal sacrifice to police the internet in order to protect the "professional" out there from wanna be's like myself. I applaud your good work and please don't hesitate to come back over and over so you can keep me in line.

After all, without readers like you what would be the point of sharing a careers worth of hard earned knowledge and expertise with interested readers?

I don't want to keep you from your important work but I would like to leave you with one parting comment?

****** *** ******* ***** ****** *** ** ********** !

Till next time, XOXOXO